Old, Familiar Pain
Some things come to pass, and some come to stay. Though even vivid reminders fade, they are there, and waking memory goads wandering thoughts. I recently heard the story of a man with such memory dysfunction as to never be able to forget. He bore this burden for many years until, burdened by grief, he took his life. Such is the power of remorse and the weight of years.
Memories also bring the sweet ache. We wonder what might have been if only. Such reminiscences are treasured thoughts and akin to wistful longings. They contain unrequited wish-fulfillment rather than regret. They hurt, but also warm the heart. We long to return to a time and place which desire can never be. Occasionally, someone will attempt to replicate the past only to be disheartened in the failed attempt.
Each of us carries an array of hurts and haunting memories that frequently arise and give pause. Some of these are hard to explain and misunderstood when told, so what’s the use? We can’t outrun the past, and familiar phantoms remain, not far from present reality. Our minds wander the back roads by the river of memory, and we discover wealth and wisdom on the journey.
Our pasts are to be as committed to Christ as our futures. Whether the thoughts of yesterday bring joy or pain, they are in the hands of the Father. Hurts from the past can be instructive, and the burned hand teaches best. If we could do away with painful memories, would we? Those things went a long way toward making us. Great good can come from great grief.
Dealing with hurts requires more than bumper-sticker wisdom, and it’s not easy despite the sayings of songs and friends. It’s hard to commit things to Christ when they (and we) keep getting up from the altar. A continual process of contrition is needed to address recurrent themes. Though it sounds daunting, it’s not as bad as all that if we approach it the right way. We must take a firm stance before we address the ball.
Victory for the Christian is only possible when life for Christ is the sole objective. Only when we live in Christ are we able to confront the shifting sands of life. He is able to do everything He claims He can do, but we must do what we can do, as well. And, each day, we are making memories to treasure or regret. While we cannot escape the past, we don’t have to live in it.
Jeremiah said that God plans for us to have hope and a future. Memories may bring sadness and sorrow. While there is value in reflection, God wants us to look ahead. We run out of plans, but God never does. He knows what happened, and He knows what will happen.
Weep in secret, but do much more. Wipe the tears from your eyes and take the hand of God. You’ve got places to go and people to see. A future just for you.
Sterl