I’ve Done a Lot of Foolish Things That I Really Didn’t Mean
One of the things I’ve learned about people is that when they say, “I don’t know” they’re not lying. Now, I don’t mean they are being totally honest, but the truth is that sometimes that statement derives more from a lack of self-awareness than deceit. No one has complete self-awareness all the time, so we all can be found in the uncomfortable position of having to explain something indecipherable to ourselves. We live a lot of our lives in a fog.
When other people look at our lives, they assume that all our actions are planned. If they are planned, they are purposeful- premeditated. It’s hard to tell them otherwise, especially if they are an aggrieved party. “I don’t know why I did it,” “I didn’t mean it that way,” “It’s not what you think” all ring hollow, but they may be true- to some, if not a great, degree. It’s no wonder we have difficulty understanding others when we don’t even understand ourselves.
Now, I’m not excusing lazy, unaccountable living, but we need to understand that our motives deriving from the sinful nature are not always known to the conscious mind. When creation fell, everything fell, and this includes both the conscious and subconscious aspects of humanity. Shakespeare implored us to know ourselves, but the Bible tells us that the heart is deceitful above all things and defies understanding. We all meant to do better.
We are people who look for a moment into a mirror and go our way forgetting the reflection. We have moments of clarity that fade to black. It would do us good to live an examined life as our basic nature tends to let things slide. David often asked God to teach him about himself so he’d understand his weaknesses. A teachable spirit would help us since we’ve all taken a “zero” on some of life’s tests. It sounded familiar, but we couldn’t come up with the answer.
In Bible times, mirrors were not as crisp and sharp as they are today. Peering into them was “seeing darkly.” It was hard for a person to get a good image of themselves. In much the same way, it’s hard for people to come to grips with their own motives in our confusing times. The Bible tells us to look into God’s perfect law to come to a complete and correct understanding of things. When I look around, things seem fuzzy, but, when I look into God’s Word, they clear right up.
Of the things done in my life, I really didn’t mean for some to turn out the way they did. I didn’t know my own motives or the extent of my actions. The same may be (or have been) true of you. I can’t explain to others what I don’t know myself. One day, I will understand myself and others just as God really understands me even now. From here, though, I can get a sharper image from God’s Word. God help me (and us) to look well.
Sterl
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