Houston, We Have a Problem
There is no “base” in life. You are never “home free.” As much as we desire peace and tranquility, it is hard to plan and of fleeting duration. In the end, even Solomon’s opulence led to emptiness and despair. Man was born to trouble. Though the Bible is replete with references to peace and harmony, Jesus Himself said offenses were impossible to avoid. It is not always in the cards to live in or enjoy peace. It may take two to tangle (or tango), but a fight needs only one aggressor. It’s hard to escape something that keeps on coming. Hello, T-R-O-U-B-L-E.
The key is not to seek the impossible, a trouble-free life available to none, but to learn to handle the inevitable, a life peppered with set-backs, misunderstandings and pain. Much has been written on conflict resolution which begs the question of why there is so much unresolved grief. Part of the problem may be that we give up too easily and too soon. I just read of two suicides committed by teenagers. How sad that they despaired at such a young age! They were convinced that life was not worth living. Everything is not the big deal we make of it.
The problem that you are facing is not being discussed all over town and will probably be of little import in eternity. Most folks don’t really care about it, and you might be surprised at the level of sympathy you could find. Tragically, we often surround ourselves with people who don’t feel our pain (like you know who), and might even delight in adding to it for whatever sad reason. Such thoughts ring home to me as one having had the continual privilege of being around sincere people who never let anything die. Give a brother a break.
A problem is as big as you let it be. It thrills me to hear stories of people overcoming huge physical, mental and emotional obstacles on their way to success. I am heartened to embrace the bravery of these. They reduced the mountain to a molehill. I’m a little better at doing it the other way around, and so are most people I know. Continual focus on a problem causes it to consume us, fill our world and hinder our vision. An object held too close to the eye will block out everything else regardless of its true size. Let it go. Let it go. Let it go.
In the church-world, I have witnessed rousing arguments over obscure passages of Scripture that were seldom read or quoted. Truthfully, the exact meanings of said passages had been in some doubt since the first century, but that fact was lost on the zealots. If only those things were central tenets of faith. Then, at least, the whole affair would not have been a total waste of time. It shouldn’t take that much grace to concede a point now and then. Understanding that problems are inevitable ought to make us reticent to add to the glut. I’m just sayin’.
We make it harder than it has to be. Most of our difficulties could (and should) be worked out. People will say, “We’re at an impasse.” The truth is they are driving in the center of the road. It only takes a little bit of movement by each party, and traffic could get up to speed. We will be greatly condemned in eternity for our failure to deal with issues- minor and otherwise. The dearth of real forgiveness and reconciliation is a great indicator to the world that believers are not much different than they. There has been great loss, but great opportunity remains.
Christians have famously failed at resolving disputes. Our track record may have disinclined us to seek righteous judgment and real love. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice… Paul thought otherwise. He implored the Corinthians to think of conflict resolution as a spiritual matter. He said if we do not attempt difficult judgments we are already defeated. In a fallen world, we will not escape the difficulties of sin and selfishness, but that doesn’t mean we ought not try. When I come to Jesus, He forgives me. When I come your way, will you?
Sterl
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